Everybody loves a good Forrester Research study. But who’s got time to read them? Not to worry. We’ve got you covered with our synopses of two of this research giant’s recent reports:

1. Introducing new social technographics
Back in 2006, Forrester created its Social Technographics Ladder to classify online social behavior into six overlapping categories, from top to bottom: “Inactives. Spectators. Joiners. Collectors. Critics. Creators.” The idea being that the higher you go on the Ladder, the more user-generated content you’re contributing online.

Recently, an exponential increase in the number of rapid conversations happening on Twitter and Facebook has inspired a new rung to be added to the ladder: “Conversationalists.”

This group tweets or posts updates to their social network status at least weekly.

In terms of demographics, Conversationalists are 36% Generation Y-types (18 to 29 years old), and are the most female-skewed of all categories on the Ladder (56% are female). They’re also the most likely group to have a college degree.

The Social Technographics Ladder has proven to be effective in identifying appropriate methods to reach customers.

The next time you’re writing a creative brief, don’t forget to take a look at the new Social Technographics Ladder to help you better define your target audience as being on one of the rungs.

2. The future of online customer experience
This report examines trends in online customer behaviour and arrives at four key attributes they believe will shape the next phase of web development. To help you remember, they’ve created an acronym: “CARS.”

Customized by the end user.
Aggregated at the point of use.
Relevant to the moment.
Social as a rule, not an exception.

A good example of CARS being used to create a better online customer experience comes from Zillow.com’s iPhone app. This real estate search application covers three of CARS’ four attributes: customized, aggregated, and relevant. Users move down the street with the mobile app while it pulls prices and details of nearby homes.

Here’s how the Zillow.com example breaks down:

Customization
Allows users to filter the homes based on personal preferences, save favorites, and receive updates.

Aggregated
Uses GPS data to display a map, while also pulling pricing and house details, all delivered to your screen simultaneously.

Relevant
Due to recent economic conditions, it’s currently a buyer’s market for real estate.

The CARS acronym is a great tool to use early in the development of interactive projects. It could make the difference between users returning to a website/application, or thinking it’s not user-friendly enough and finding a competitor.

Last week I promised to hail a cab and take our temperature via Jeff Goodby’s Cab Test.

Essentially: What are we doing that people notice and (hopefully) enjoy noticing enough so that they remember it.

Some good news, some bad…

The good news is we’re getting noticed. Budweiser commercials in particular. Bud’s NFL sponsorship and Super Bowl promotion specifically.

The bad news is, not by cab drivers.

It was actually a bartender at the House On Parliament who admitted to remembering and liking Budweiser’s NFL ads. And it was a young patron within earshot of me at the bar who chimed in on the “chick who kicks the ham” – confirming the enduring power of Bud’s Super Bowl sponsorship.

As for the cabbie responsible for delivering me to the House On Parliament? Well he articulated (passionately, I would add) that, unlike the rest of the population, he is completely impervious to the persuasion tactics employed by advertisers.

He “never buys anything based on the lies they tell on TV,” and knows that, “whatever they advertise in the paper, you can be sure they ain’t got when you get to the damn store.”

(Alas, the damage we’ve done ourselves!)

My driver did however very much like the ad where the guys jump on the moving couch like it’s a bobsled. He insisted it was a Rogers ad (it’s for Bell), and further insisted that though he likes the ad he’d never buy their phones (it’s an ad for their TV product) because he’s “a Bell guy.” (They made him sign a contract.)

So where does all this rigorously mined qualitative research leave us?

Well, as a profession near the bottom (and sinking) on the most reviled list according to a recent Gallup survey, I know of at least one cab driver who would concur.

Time management is dead. Project management is dead. The MBA is dead. Conventional marketing is dead. Traditional advertising is dead. Print is dead. ebooks are dead. Commercial radio is dead. Satellite radio is dead. Network television is dead. Social media is dead. Journalism is dead.

One of the more recent posts on this site had me thinking (inadvertently) about the liberal use of “death” in the context of business blog, article and book headlines and titles. (Which is a pleasant change as my thoughts are, for the most part, exclusively focused on death alone.) The death of all of the aforementioned topics have been written about. The list of “Is dead” and “Death of” articles and books goes on and on.

So, why all the dramatic (and often wildly overstated) predictions? Well, part of the reason rests with human nature. We like simplicity. We like a straightforward narrative. But more importantly, we like change.

In fact, according Russell Poldrack, a neuroscientist and researcher at the University of Texas, the brain is “built to ignore the old and focus on the new.” The brain is wired to appreciate novelty, which, as he surmises, is important from an evolutionary standpoint, as we don’t spend all our time noticing the things in our surroundings that don’t change.

Hey, that chair is in the same place! Hey, the rug is still on the floor! Hey, nobody is still buying that whole ‘sex addiction’ thing! (Sorry – that last one was a little too Tiger-Woods-centric).

Mr. Poldrack goes on to state that novelty causes the dopamine system to be activated, which is a “gimme more” neurotransmitter (also known as the “bank fee administrator” transmitter). So, our brains literally crave change. Or in the case of “trend-watching,” impending change. Which would explain why, given the opportunity to choose between Reflections On The Evolution Of Consumer Listening Patterns versus RADIO IS DEAD, people would be inclined to read the latter.

What does it all mean?

In short, when it comes to creating a headline for an article or a title for a business book, it’s important to convey the idea that you’re about to talk about is a huuuuuuge change. Even if it means stretching the truth a bit. Or a lot. It’s all about being more “changeyoriffic,” as Mr. Poldrack put it.

Okay. Poldrack never used that word. I kind of made that word up. It sounded more novel and exciting.

So, the 2010 Winter Olympics are over and Canada’s performance was lackluster to say the least. This isn’t just my opinion, pretty much everyone I talk to agrees.

No, I’m not talking about the performance of our athletes. I’m talking about Canada’s batch of Olympic advertising. It wasn’t great. In fact, in summarizing the Olympic advertising we’ve been inundated with these past couple of weeks, my initial plan was to award Gold, Silver and Bronze to those ads worthy of the podium. Unfortunately, there wasn’t a Gold to be seen. Not sure there was even a Silver.

I initially suspected that I was just being too tough a judge, so I asked around. I asked everyone I could. And mostly people outside of the industry. When asked to name a commercial that stood out to them, most people couldn’t. Or they named a commercial or campaign that stood out because it was annoying.

If there was a “winner”, it seems it’s the Coca-Cola “hockey” spot – which I agree is a great one. Hard to award it Gold, however, as it turns out that spot is eight years old (and created by our very own Bob Goulart and Dave Hamilton) and originally created for the 2002 Winter Games. Is an eight-year-old spot really the best we can do?

And while I didn’t think any one spot was worthy of Gold, I did think there were a few flashes of brilliance.

HBC’s tagline “We Were Made For This” was outstanding. Leveraging their heritage, they told us that their rich Canadian history has led them to this moment – the moment where they can design and sell the outfits for our home Olympic Games. I loved the line and the emotion it stirred. It almost made me forget they’re owned by an American. Nonetheless, the strategy and the line “We Were Made For This” stood out for me.

There were a few very nice spots for VISA (don’t love that the iconic voiceover is Morgan Freeman – an American), but nice Olympic stories, very well told.

And McDonald’s had some nice moments. Not quite the glory years when they used to leverage the wonderful line “Anything’s Possible When You Have a Dream,” but some nice moments, nonetheless.

All in all, maybe the big win was just being associated with these games. Regardless of the creative. It’ll be interesting to see how much “post-sell” the major sponsors of the games do. Because if those brands can somehow – even slightly – attach themselves to Sidney Crosby’s golden goal, or Joannie Rochette’s triumph in the face of adversity, or any of the countless stories that made us all feel so proud to be Canadian these past two weeks, maybe that’s the victory. Maybe just being attached to these games was Golden. Of course, some more memorable creative wouldn’t have hurt either.

One of advertising’s most respected creative leaders, Jeff Goodby, has said that advertising is only great if it passes his “cab test.”

The cab test is when an ad exec gets into a taxi and the driver asks whether they’ve done any work he’s familiar with. If the answer is “No,” you’ve failed the test.

The exercise is Mr. Goodby’s call-to-arms. He’d like to see us get back to making marketing communications that are truly famous – outside the navel gazing walls of our awards show circuit.

Jeff Goodby’s a guy I look up to. His agency’s one I’ve long admired. So naturally I’m hailing a cab this afternoon to take our temperature.

I’ll share my findings here in a week. Stay tuned!